Asus Eee Box: Why is every Linux distro so slow, and what can I do?

This here computer, the Asus Eee Box, it’s been givin’ me a heap of trouble. I wanted to put one of them Linux things on it, you know, ’cause everyone says it’s the cat’s meow. But it’s been slower than molasses in January. Just ain’t right.

Linux Distribution is Slow on Asus Eee Box

I tried a whole bunch of them Linux distributions. Think they call ’em distros. Like that Ubuntu one, that’s real popular. Nope, ran like a three-legged dog. Then I tried that Mint one, supposed to be all minty fresh and fast. Still slow, like watching paint dry. You name it, I probably tried it.

Try to Install Linux on Asus Eee Box

Getting these things on this Asus Eee Box, it ain’t easy. They say go into something called the “BIOS.” Well, I poked around in there, and it’s all Greek to me. But I did get it to look at the CD thingy first. Still felt like forever to get it going. It’s a real pain in my neck, this whole thing.

This one fella, he was going on about somethin’ called Xubuntu. Said it was good for old clunkers like this Asus Eee Box. I tried that, too. It ain’t no speed demon, but it’s a little bit better. This computer only got 2GB of that flash stuff. It is really too small. I reckon that’s part of the problem. Not enough room to swing a cat in there.

Asus Eee Box is too old

My neighbor’s grandson, he’s a real whiz with these computers. He told me this Asus Eee Box is just too old. Said it’s like tryin’ to put a jet engine on a horse-drawn buggy. Makes sense, I guess. It is an old computer, came out way back in whenever. This here Asus, it’s from 2007, and he’s only got 2GB of space. I ain’t no spring chicken myself, so I know how it feels to slow down.

Find a Good Linux for Asus Eee Box

• Tried that Damn Small Linux. It’s small, all right. Runs but don’t do much.
• Then there’s this MX Linux. Seems okay, kinda like that Xubuntu but a little different.
• Tried Ubuntu 10.04, it works but still slow.
• Some folks talk about something called Easy Peasy, but it is not easy as they said.
• I even tried the 32bit version, whatever that means.

I don’t know much about them bits, but I tried it anyway. It just don’t make sense, these Linux things, they’re supposed to make old computers run like new. But on this Asus Eee Box, it’s like pullin’ teeth. It’s a slow go. It really is.

Still Try to Make Asus Eee Box Run Faster

I reckon I’m just gonna have to live with it. This old Asus Eee Box, it is what it is. I’ll keep fiddlin’ with it, though. Maybe I’ll find some magic combination of buttons to push that’ll make it run like a scalded dog. Or maybe I’ll just use it as a doorstop. Who knows.

This whole Linux thing, it’s got me all flustered. It ain’t as easy as they make it out to be. At least not on this Asus Eee Box. They said use Linux on old computer, it can run fast. But, here I am, and the Linux distribution runs extremely slow on Asus Eee Box. I just want a computer that works without all the fuss. Is that too much to ask?

I keep trying to make this Asus Eee Box run faster. I read all these things online, but it’s like they’re speakin’ a different language. I just do what they say, push this button, type this thing in. Sometimes it does something, sometimes it just sits there lookin’ at me.

Maybe the Asus Eee Box Just Hate Linux

Maybe this computer just hates Linux. Like oil and water, you know? They just don’t mix. I don’t know why, they just don’t. Maybe it’s just too old and set in its ways. Like me, I guess. I don’t like change much either.

But I ain’t givin’ up yet. I’m stubborn like a mule. I’ll keep at it until I figure somethin’ out. Or until this Asus Eee Box finally gives up the ghost. Whichever comes first, I reckon. My neighbor told me, the computer is too old, you should buy a new one. But I don’t want to. This is my computer, I want to make it work.

This whole thing has been a real education, though. Learned a lot about these computers and these Linux things. Still don’t understand most of it, but I know more than I did before. And that’s somethin’, ain’t it? I just wish my Asus Eee Box would cooperate a little bit more. That’s all I’m askin’ for.

If you are looking for Linux for Asus Eee Box, well, good luck. You will need it.